SINGLE PROFESSIONALS: You write, I answer!

Friday, May 08, 2009



Q: HI, CHRIS: I’ve been dating this beautiful lady for a couple months now. She just turned 35, but looks about 25. We get along great and I feel like the luckiest guy in the world. So why am I writing? Well, over dinner the other night, my sweetheart dropped a bombshell on me. In “another life” it turns out she was a stripper for about six months. I was stunned and pretended it didn’t bother me, but now all I can think about is how my honey was baring all to the world. I really, really care for her and was starting to fall in love, but now I’m not so sure. What should I do?

---Stumped in Salt Lake City

A: Dear Bachelor: First of all, your sweetie wasn’t “baring all to the world." A couple dozen surly men a night, maybe, but not the whole world. But yes, I can see where this bit of news would hit you like a ton of bricks. So decide right now. Do you love her today for who she is? Or are you going to judge her for what she did years ago? Unless she's planning on doing more lap dances for pay, I'd stick around and see what else may develop. And if you're lucky, maybe she'll give you a private performance!

Q: HI, CHRIS: I’ve been divorced for about seven years and have an adorable 9-year old daughter, "Nicole." Two years ago, while Nicole was visiting her dad overseas, I had emergency gallbladder surgery. Several post-op visits later, my surgeon and I fell madly in love. Dr. “X” and I had a torrid affair all summer long, even after my daughter returned home. I finally broke it off, because he was married with three kids, and the guilt finally got to me. Now I miss him terribly. Did I do the right thing?

---Dumped the doctor in San Diego

A: Dear Bachelorette: Oh, my goodness, do you really have to ask me if you did the right thing? Well, yes, you did. And no, you didn’t do the right thing by having a hot and heavy affair with a married man and your surgeon, no less. Please, if you ever need emergency surgery again—run, don’t walk, to the nearest doctor wearing a skirt!

Q: HI, CHRIS: O.K., what do I do about a woman I’ve been dating only five weeks, but she’s already pressuring me to see her exclusively? I met her through a matchmaking service for professionals. Now all I want to do is meet other women and get her off my back. Yes, I really like “Sandy,” but her clinginess is causing me to run, run, run. What’s up with women and commitment so early in the game?

---Boston, Sprinting out of her life

A: Dear Bachelor: Ahh...the Venus and Mars thing. Women and commitment, men and their fear of commitment. But as surprised as you may be, I'm with you on this one. Five weeks is way to early for your insecure girlfriend to be calling the shots. She needs to chill a bit, before you run so fast you qualify for the Boston marathon!

For inquiries on publishing or syndicating the Ask the Matchmaker! advice column in print, online, or TV/radio, please contact Chris Stelmack at: 206-372-5798.

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Chris Stelmack, president of 4M Club, caters to affluent bachelors
looking for their significant bachelorette. Single professionals
are welcome to E-mail Chris at:, or
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