SINGLE PROFESSIONALS: You write, I answer!

Friday, May 01, 2009



Q: HI, CHRIS: I met this woman for the first time yesterday afternoon. She’s very pretty with a great body, pleasant personality, and seemed smart enough for a fashion model. My concern is her face was so painted, you could scrape the make-up off with a knife. I own a very successful accounting practice, and I just can’t see bringing anyone around who wears so much war paint. Just wondering what I should do.

---Los Angeles, Blinded by the make-up

A: Dear Bachelor: She’s sexy, smart, nice, and pretty to boot; but wears too much make-up, you say? Well first, give her the benefit of the doubt. She’s a model and maybe she just came off a shoot. So don’t run yet. Good women are hard to find. Ask her out again and if she shows up looking like Loni Anderson (some might argue that’s not a bad thing), here’s what you do: tell her you’re allergic to most cosmetics and you’d love to see her wear less. Then quickly and sweetly say that with her natural beauty, she barely needs any. I’m guessing next time you see her, she’ll be glowing head to toe with half the make-up. Bring a trowel, though, just in case.

Q: HI, CHRIS: A co-worker fixed me up a few weeks ago, and my date and I hit it off over a casual lunch. But now I’m starting to worry. Several nights ago, “Larry” invited me at the last minute to see a Broadway musical downtown. He wanted dinner before the play and we had exactly 50-minutes until curtain time. He asked me if I had any suggestions, so I chose a restaurant by the theater since we were pressed for time. Larry said he'd been there before and wasn't nuts about the service, but he didn't know where else to go. After some cajoling, I convinced him to eat there since the clock was ticking. The service turned out to be great, as I told the wait staff we were in a rush. Well, Larry was in a huff throughout dinner, barely spoke to me, and he was very abrupt with the waitress. We made the show with a couple minutes to spare, but his attitude just spoiled everything for me. Who is the real “Larry,” the man I had fun with at lunch, or the grinch who acted like such a jerk at dinner?

---Last minute date in Louisville

A: Dear Bachelorette: As you know, I believe in the 3-date rule, but I’m about to throw it all down the drain. Sounds like Larry has some serious maturity issues and he needs to grow up. There is never any excuse to be rude to the wait staff or to your date. He should still be at the "I’m trying to charm you" stage. Dump this loser.

Q: HI, CHRIS: A friend of mine wants to set me up with this knock-out blonde. She lives in Memphis and I’m in Seattle, but I have no problem visiting or flying her out. We exchanged phone messages a couple times, but didn’t hook up until yesterday. Imagine my surprise when I heard my phone ringing at 5:30 a.m. on Saturday, and it was “Barbie.” Bleary eyed and groggy, she proceeded to bombard me with her tales of woe---a botched boob job. What ditz would call someone so early in the morning and not make note of the 3-hour time zone difference?

---Too early to breathe in Seattle

A: Dear Bachelor: A ditz named, “Barbie,” that’s who.

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