SINGLE PROFESSIONALS: You write, I answer!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Q & A / This Guy Is Just A Total Loser

Q: Hi, Chris:

I need to know if there is any help for my situation.

I met the owner of a small shop doing repairs on my car. After my car was fixed and bill paid, he sent me a text and asked if I was interested.

We communicated by text for the next couple days. I told him I was used to phone calls and not texts. I was told he would call the next day and he didn’t (nor did he text.)

One week later I get a text telling me he had his kids for Easter weekend and he had been slammed at work. He said it wasn’t an excuse, just what has been going on.

I told him a guy who is interested in me generally keeps in contact. He texted back he didn't know me and wasn’t sure if he was interested. I told him when he figured things out let me know. I haven't heard from him in over a week.

What is the proper way to reply to a guy who shows interest, and then says he doesn't know if he’s interested after all?

Will I be hearing from this guy again? If so, how do I treat him? I have always been a doormat in the past, and I think I was too harsh with the reply I gave him.

--- Baffled in Baton Rouge

A: Dear Bachelorette:

This guy is a total loser with a capital “L” (for lazy?)

First, he’s the owner of a small business who hit on one of his customers. Maybe he thought it ethically smarter to text you? It wasn't, it was goosebumps sleazy.

Secondly, for all you know he’s married (or separated) and just looking for a little action on the side.

Third, he sounds arrogant and cocky, and not the least bit interested in you or your feelings.

LASTLY, why did you even bother chasing this guy? Chasing or making demands never lands the man. There was nothing wrong with anything you told him, but it won't be necessary with the right guy (and he definitely is not.)

Please take a crash course in SELF-ESTEEM, so you recognize when a man is really interested the next time around (‘Mr. Fix It’ isn’t your guy!)

P.S. When a man respects a woman (and vice versa), your communications together will flow naturally. This clearly wasn’t the case. If he were seriously interested, he would have asked you on a real date (even coffee!) within hours of meeting you. Instead, he played you for a fool texting only at his convenience.

Side note: Readers, texts and relationships are NOT a match. Texting should be short, sweet and NO CONVERSATIONS. Save important chats for face-to-face meetings or the phone (yes, the TELL-EEE-PHONE, from the Stone Ages.)